So it begins.

Spiralling out of control.

It must be that time of year, huh?

I don't listen when I talk, think I talk just to be heard.

Ohhhhh, Dan Potthast. Always making it look brighter.

Went (am on) on a bender this weekend, it was (is) fun, no shag carpet (yet), no passing out (maybe).

BUT!

It was (is) fun. I can't say I had a funny moment of clarity, no. BUT!

I did walk home in the rain at five a.m. on Friday...Saturday, I guess.

Spin like a faaaaaaaaan.

The term liquid courage is terrible. If you say that, or believe in that, you're totally wrong.

Alcohol makes nothing easier to say. Well, it's easier, I guess, but not at all? You know, you just dance around a desired point and never stick it. STICK IT! Deeeeeeep blue. Eh, I suppose it's okay though, can't get too beat up over it.

Good Sunday, though. 

Mentally preparing myself for a hell of a day tomorrow; not because of 4.20.

More like I have to get up at seven and work all day while all my friends are high and I'm probably not.

I and I.

If I were to choose a religion it would be Rastafari, simply for the fact that smoking cannabis would be a requirement, and I would have a healthy excuse to say "I and I" on a regular basis.

I will eventually meet a girl who enjoys Bad Brains, and we will 'discover' religion through Rastafari.

Let's make that happen, it sounds like fun.

Fuck.

I hate smelling like a cigarette.

I hate friends who are assholes when they're drunk.

I apologize for calling out stupidity.

I resent the fact that because I don't have a car and don't drive, you think I can't.

I am extremely sorry that you can't get laid and take it out on everybody else.

Other than on your friends you should find a healthy way to express your unfathomable anger.

Also, don't drunkenly grope girls, it's fucking disgusting.

I guess the point here is that being friends with someone shouldn't be a task, and it's becoming one.

Laziness is something I frown upon, procrastination is a different story.

One thing that I've always been aligned with is the fact that alcohol shouldn't change people, and if it does, they shouldn't drink. There is an extremely broad line between opening up while drunk and being a completely different and regrettable person while drunk. 

I get it, alcohol is a depressant, and I'm exercising that aspect of it right now by being so pissed off about this, but the difference is...I'm admitting it.

It's not very often that I get so upset about something like this.

And it's not religion this time. That was a fluke, people are becoming too vocal.

Nah this is something completely...unwelcome.

That is definitely the best way to put it.

It's mostly the weather, and this cold.

This feeling keeps showing up unannounced and it's pissing me off more and more.

And it's been showing up consistently earlier as of late, pissing all over the floor of my brain.

I guess I'll just have to put up with it for a little while longer.

Hopefully it'll be gone by the summer, it's been trying to leave quite a while now but keeps fucking up its departure. 

Throwing it all out there.

I'm not going to heaven because I don't believe in it.

In fact my disbelief in heaven is probably just as strong and stout as your BELIEF in heaven.

We all have faith in what we want.

And if we can't have faith in ourselves, we find something else to find faith in.

Don't fuck with me, and don't say I haven't tried, because I have.

Religion is something that people use as a crutch when they're unhappy with themselves and their lives. I may not be the most positive person, but I STRONGLY believe that we are all COMPLETELY capable of change, and change of the others around us for the positive. HOWEVER...trying to make sure someone around you goes to HEAVEN is not a POSITIVE change when you realize that nearly 40% of America no longer believes in your heaven.

Good fucking night.

So here's a few things.

Notice how most people that speak about religion and how they found Jesus are truly sad?

Seriously, they are bummed out.

Hold on.

Notice how a lot of religious people get more sad more often? Why the hell is that? Is there something that I'm missing out on by not going to church. Does church teach you compassion, does church teach you drama and emotion?

Or does church teach you faith, by getting your ass out of bed every Sunday morning, every sabbath, every one day of the week that you're supposed to do absolutely nothing. Doesn't that feeling, that urge to go back to sleep, make some sort of primal sense to you? Makes sense to me.

Sunday can be a lot of things, but to everyone it's a day forgotten real fast. Whatever it is that you're doing on a Sunday, try to savor it, it'll be gone soon. Fastest day you'll forget, I promise. Maybe I should be writing this to a newborn or something.

Nah, but really, it's what you make it. Do you really think that if some guy or gal or something up there in the sky wants you to not have fun on Sunday because you got up too early and slept the day away? If you're going to get up early for him, why not have a delicious feast in his honor, instead of starving yourself or eating piss and chips or whatever it is you do. Wine and skin??..flakes? Go grill a burger, tastier, more fulfilling, more zen like (hell, even a veggie burger, that's what I'd do anymore).

We all find our own peace, do we not? Is that peace not all we need to clear ourselves, to feel at least a little cleansed, a little better? Sure, some of us don't want peace in the conventional sense, but it can be whatever you want. I just don't think it should be what everyone ELSE wants! Why do SO MANY people go to church and then SCREAM and YELL about how EVERYONE IS MADE FUCKING DIFFERENTLY and that WE ALL THINK DIFFERENTLY? How can so many differences be so fucking consolidated to one null point? The sharp tack of humanity has been dwindled down to a point no sharper than the tip of a flaccid DICK due to people DRONING like SLAVES to something THEY'VE NEVER EVEN SEEN!?

I can assure you I reach an equal clarity whilst reading a fucking comic, and I don't even like comics that much.